Hamilton: BTAAGP Act 4

Act 4:

This Time It’s Personal

Scene 1

[HAMILTON sits alone in a room brooding. Enter ELEANOR ROOSEVELT]

ROOSEVELT: Sir, get up.

HAMILTON: I am up

ROOSEVELT: You’re not up on things.

HAMILTON: On what things should I be up?

ROOSEVELT: Secession.

HAMILTON: I know Abe is succeeding me.

ROOSEVELT: No sir, not succession, secession.

HAMILTON: As long as it’s not a recession.

ROOSEVELT: Sir, the south has broken off from us and declared themselves as the Confederate States of America.

HAMILTON: I never liked them anyway.

ROOSEVELT:  They’re being led by Jefferson, Jackson, and Burr

.HAMILTON: I guess I should go stop them huh?

ROOSEVELT: Probably a good idea. You want me to send in the marines?

HAMILTON: No. This may have started out as a matter of national security, but they made it personal.

ROOSEVELT: What are you going to do?

HAMILTON: I’m going do some Reconstruction…[stands up and puts on sunglasses.] On their faces

End Scene 1

Scene 2

[Open in a comfy home environment. ELIZABETH HAMILTON sits in a chair whetting a knife]

[Enter HAMILTON].

HAMILTON: Hello Elizabeth.

ELIZABETH: Alex!

[The two embrace.]

HAMILTON: Elizabeth, I have something to tell you. You know I love you more than anything in the world. Will except for liberty, but you are a close second. I know we haven’t established any of this or shown it, but trust me, it’s real. But back to the subject at hand, I am going to go and kill the three of them, Burr, Jackson, and Jefferson. I am going to do this alone. It’s too personal for me to do it any other way.

ELIZABETH: Alex, before you do this, please hear what I have to say.

HAMILTON: I know what you are going to say wife of mine. I have told it to myself a thousand times. What right have I to put my life in danger? Not when I have you and the children counting on me, not to mention all the children of America. What right have I to seek personal vengeance when the people elected me to do the job of President? Is the burden they have placed upon me too great to allow me life the cold blade of vengeance?

ELIZABETH [placing her hands on HAMILTON’S shoulders]: Alex, listen to me.

HAMILTON: Yes?
ELIZABETH:  Get ‘em! GET EM!

HAMILTON: By liberty, I love you!

[The two make out.]

End Scene 2

Scene 3

[Open on an office wherein are the three conspirators. JEFFERSON sits at a desk looking pensive, BURR paces about, and JACKSON leans in a corner of his own volition, because no one puts JACKSON in a corner.]

JEFFERSON: Well, we’re all probably going to die.

BURR: None of that, no, none of that my friend, solidarity is, yes it is our one chance.

JACKSON: Let the north declare war on us. Let them come! I am ready to bury my hickory stick in a few skulls.

BURR: Jackson, leave us, yes go, go for a time.

JACKSON: Fine, I needed a smoke anyway.

[Exit JACKSON]

BURR: Now, my friend,

(Singing:)

Now, together at the last,

As we were in times past,

Now our cause, it may seem hopeless,

But I tell you we’ll have victory’s kiss

We are going to win, win, win,

We’ll win so much it’ll be a sin,

But if we’re to do that we must be one.

United in purpose and all of that fun

Or will we come together and fuze,

And by that be a perfect ten,

Resulting in a big, big, win?

JEFFERSON: Whatever.

End Scene 3

Scene 4

[Outside, JACKSON lights a cigarette and takes a whiff of it.]

JACKSON: Mmm! This tastes good.

HAMILTON [offstage]: Like a cigarette should?

JACKSON: Who said that?

[Enter HAMILTON]

HAMILTON: Hello Jackson!

JACKSON: I had heard the rumors of your death were greatly exaggerated.

HAMILTON: No more so than the rumors that you killed me.

JACKSON [Raising his hickory stick]: Dog! I’m going to finish what I started in the senate chamber!

[HAMILTON pulls out a pistol and fires it point blank into JACKSON. It’s not very effective.]

JACKSON: [laughing] Fool! No bullet can slay me!

HAMILTON: Then I guess I’ll have to improvise.

[HAMILTON pulls out the Declaration of Independence and rolls it up. The two begin dance-dueling one another.]

JACKSON (singing):

I’m gonna beat you with my hickory stick,

If you think otherwise than you’re just thick

I’m going to whack you straight, out of your life,

Of death and decay, you will be nice and rife.

HAMILTON (singing):

I hear from you a lot of big words

They’re less substantive than curds,

You say you’re going to make me dead,

But it is your number that’s been read

JACKSON: (singing):

Don’t know about reading, but get ready to write,

You’ll be needing an epitaph after losing this fight,

My moves and my lyrics they are out of sight,

And you will fall before the power of my might,

HAMILTON (singing):

Yeah they’re real nice if you’re a fool,

I don’t even think you went to school,

Your lines and rhymes have nothing on me boy,

I have more power and words than Leo Tolstoy.

JACKSON (singing):

That’s well and good if you’re into Russia,

But if that’s all ya got I’m gonna crush ya,

You’ve a lot of knowledge between your ears,

But when it comes to dueling I have no peers.

HAMILTON: (singing):

Then why not quit your fooling and run me through,

Face it, you’re no more a dueler than you are a zoo

They couldn’t play a fanfare for you on a kazoo,

And at your funeral, they won’t fill even one pew,

JACKSON (singing):

Just for that I will make you bleed,

On your blood the earth shall feed,

You have less rhythm than a rotten orange,

And your lines are so…so…so…

[HAMILTON runs JACKSON through with the Declaration of Independence.]

HAMILTON: Word to your mother.

End Scene 4

Scene 5

 [Back in the office, JEFFERSON is now alone. Enter HAMILTON]

HAMILTON: Jefferson!

JEFFERSON [grabbing a gun and pointing it at HAMILTON]: Stay back!

HAMILTON [lays his gun on the ground and slowly walks toward his former friend]: Jefferson, I seek only to talk.

JEFFERSON: What would you say?

HAMILTON: Why Jefferson? Why?
JEFFERSON: Why not? You would have made yourself Grand Despot of this land.

HAMILTON: My friend, I would never do that!

JEFFERSON: You overstepped your bounds. You declared war, you issued unprecedented executive orders, you were mad with power.

HAMILTON: But Tom, violence is never the answer!

JEFFERSON: What about the Revolutionary War?

HAMILTON: That doesn’t count.

JEFFERSON: What about the War of 1812?

HAMILTON: That doesn’t count either. Look, perhaps you are right. Perhaps I did overstep my bounds; nay not perhaps, I did. But that is why I have you, and congress, to tell me when I do that and so that these things can be worked out democratically. If violence is our first resort when dealing with each other instead of our last, than we are no better than animals, or Canadians. Come back to Washington with me Jefferson and we will fix things, together.

JEFFERSON [lowers gun]: Oh Alex I’m sorry [cries].

HAMILTON[embracing his friend]: So am I

[Suddenly a shot sounds from offstage and JEFFERSON falls over.]

HAMILTON [looking up]: You!

[Enter BURR]

BURR: Oh dear, did I do that? Oh, oh, so terribly sorry, I did not, no, I did not mean to kill him, I merely, yes, I merely meant to kill him.

HAMILTON: I would say I am going to make you follow after him, but that’s not true is it? Because I know his soul is in heaven but yours I’m going to send straight to Hell!

BURR: Heh, big, yes very big words for an unarmed man to a man with a gun.

HAMILTON: I have a weapon greater than all the guns in the world, Burr. Liberty!

BURR: I will take the gun.

HAMILTON [moving towards BURR and singing]:

 Here you’ll find nothing but liberty

Why it even grows on that tree!

[BURR shoots HAMILTON. HAMILTON keeps coming at him]

Liberty lying all over the place, see?

Here in America were young and free!

[BURR shoots HAMILTON. HAMILTON keeps coming at him]

Who’s free, why you and me, even that bee!

It doesn’t cost a dime, cause to it there is no fee!

[BURR fires now at point blank range, but HAMILTON is unstoppable.]

Everybody will just let you be,

[BURR tries to fire, but the gun is empty]

Cause you’ve have,

HAMILTON (shouting) LIB-ER-TY! [delivers a roundhouse kick to BURR’S face, breaking BURR’S neck and killing him instantly.]

HAMILTON: [fist-pumping]:Liberty!

[HAMILTON then grips his wounds and falls over in pain.]

KEFAUVER [offstage]: He’s in here men! [entering with a dozen people] Oh no, no, no, no, Mr. President! [rushes over to the fallen HAMILTON]

HAMILTON: Hello Kefauver. I think I’m dying.

KEFAUVER: No sir, you can’t! How can we continue without you?

HAMILTON: That’s what the vice-president is for.

KEFAUVER: But he is so young!

HAMILTON: Lincoln will learn, they all do.

KEFAUVER: But sir, you are America

HAMILTON: No! Don’t say that! Don’t ever say that! America is greater than me, its greater than you, its greater than any of us; because America is all of us. Will we contradict one another? Sure! But that’s what makes America so great, that we can contradict one another and have the liberty to do it without fear of being killed for it. America does not die with me, it continues as long as there are men and women who believe in freedom, dignity, and liberty. This is but the dawn of America, Estes, and it shall continue when I die, acting as a beacon of light and hope to the world. And how wonderful, if only for an instant, to have been a part of it. Estes, before I die, I issue my final pardon as President. I pardon Thomas Jefferson of all crimes. He knew not what he did. Give him the burial that befits one of his status.

KEFAUVER: I shall.

HAMILTON: And tell my wife, I always loved her.

KEFAUVER: of course.

HAMILTON: And tell liberty, I loved her the best.

KEFAUVER: um, sure.

HAMILTON: Farewell, farewell!

[HAMILTON dies. A mournful bugle sounds as KEFAUVER and the others carry HAMILTON and JEFFERSON’S bodies offstage as the lights fade to blackout.]

End Scene 5

End Act 4

Epilogue

[UNCLE SAM and LADY LIBERTY are back in the middle of the stage again.]

LIBERTY: Ahem, “The events and character portrayed in this film are fictitious. Any similarity to persons living or dead is purely coincidental”

UNCLE SAM: Welp, see ya around folks, and remember to buy war bonds today!

Blackout.

The End 

(or is it really The Beginning?)